Pouring From Pain

Throughout the years I know I've had my fair share of painful experiences. I'm sure many of us have. Whether this pain came from family, relationships, failures (lessons), careers, etc. We all have faced something in our lives that has forced us to experience pain we did not want. However, one lesson I had to learn early in life was that pain has a way of teaching and processing you in a unique way. Pain is a great indicator that there is something in you that will be harmful to your purpose unless it is addressed. Many of us run from pain. We try to mask it, to distract ourselves from it through new relationships, ventures, relocation, etc. The reality is until it is dealt with, that lesson will keep showing up in our lives. That is how cycles are formed. When you refuse to deal with pain and to learn the lesson attached to it, you make something that should have been for a season turn into a cycle.

What's worse? Some of us, especially leaders have a tendency to keep trying to pour out when we are in pain. Pain does not disqualify you from the call on your life, however, it is essential to take time to deal with that pain so it doesn't turn into bitterness. When your heart is not healed and you continue to try to pour out to others, you end up bleeding on the people you are called to help. You begin to experience life through the wounds you have acquired. You cannot continue to pour out effectively if your own heart needs mending. It is ok to take time to heal. It is ok to take time to process what you went through. It's ok to not have all the answers for a season while you process what you experienced. In fact, it's healthy to do so. Stop pouring from pain and heal. Learn from the pain, embrace the pain and apply the lesson that it has taught you. Then you'll be able to pour from a place of healing.

You have to decide that you don't want to be a leader that pours from pain but from a healthy place. Don't allow the words that come out of your mouth to be tainted by unforgiveness, bitterness, or grudges. Don't let the lens that you view life through become clouded by a jaded perspective. Heal. Grow. Evolve. You can't help people get to the other side of something if you haven't made it through yet. However, I promise you that if you face that pain, if you deal with the root of the issues, if you take the time to honestly examine yourself and your own decisions...you can learn and apply those lessons. You can emerge from any situation better than you were before and with a clearer perspective. The choice is yours. Do the work. Learn the lesson. Emerge as a better leader.